Lent: Pray for Families

 Today is the last in the Lent series of praying for the World, Church, Nation, Social Order, Natural Order, and Family as suggested by prayers at the end of the Episcopal Book of Common Prayer (BCP) and the Episcopal Church’s 2021 Lent curriculum: Life Transformed: The Way of Love in Lent, which is exploring the seven disciplines of the Way of Love. 

It’s Palm Sunday, also called the “Sunday of the Passion” because we hear both the narration of the triumphal entry into Jerusalem, we hear the story of Jesus’ trial and crucifixion. It’s fun to wave our palms and welcome Jesus as “the one who comes in the name of the Lord”. But we are reminded that it was the same crowds that shouted “Crucify”. So quickly can our allegiances change. 

One minute we are affirming our baptismal vows to “seek and serve Christ in all persons” and “strive for justice and peace among all people, and respect the dignity of every human being.” But in the ‘real’ world, we feel free to criticize and to ignore and even assault those same humans made in the image of God. Paul is right, I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do--this I keep on doing. (Romans 7:19).

This year of pandemic and unrest has made us intensely aware of our need for family and friends. Some of us have been made aware of the divisions in our families over politics or mask-wearing or other issues. Too many have lost family members or friends to the disease we were only beginning to know about a year ago. We have been separated from our church families and our biological families. We have had the opportunity, forced upon us, to recognize how important these relationships are.

It’s true that we may disagree over politics or lifestyle or just hair style. Perhaps we need to pause and ask if what we find strange or wrong or silly is, in fact, our family member’s way of living out their God given gifts and living into the image of God in them. Now, we have the hope of vaccinations and an end to some of the isolation. Families are thinking about how they might be able to hug grandparents and one another again. We can rebuild relationships. 

Today the Lent curriculum jumps forward to Easter announcing, “Easter! What an amazing moment it must have been to be one of the women who went down to the tomb that first Easter morning. They came expecting death and sorrow…Their expectations were blown away. This encounter with Jesus changed them so much that they were compelled to GO back to their fellow followers and proclaim the good news. Their testimony would eventually spread to every corner of the earth so that wherever we go, the love of God will meet us there…Our job now is to follow the examples of those women and go into the world proclaiming the resurrection of Jesus. Let this be the season that you go and live the full gift of the resurrection.”

This pandemic has helped us look at what ‘church’ really is. Maybe we've redefined what the "Family of God" is. It's not just those who show up in pews weekly. We’ve seen there are many ways to ‘Go’ into the world to proclaim the Good News. There has been the opportunity to evaluate and reevaluate what might really be important in our corporate lives and in our outreach and in our personal lives. Some churches are already back in their buildings, others are making plans for hybrid (online and in-person) services, and some are cautiously optimistic that worship can resume on Easter.

We are coming to the end of Lent, a time when we are encouraged to look at our life, faith, and practice. What will we carry forward into Easter, and into a post-COVID world? We are a diverse assortment of gifts and ideas and hopes and dreams. But like this image, we are in our biological and church, and even community ‘families’, we are all called to honor and love one another.

The Lent curriculum asks, “How will you GO and tell the story of the empty tomb out loud?” Think about that this week. 

How will you honor the God-image in each person you encounter, whether they are related to you by blood or just by being human?

What sorts of positive things and activities will you take as we move into a post-COVID world? What part of the last year has been surprising or life-changing?

If you wrote a letter to yourself at the beginning of Lent get it out and read it in a prayerful way. Are there changes or transformations in your life?

 We end with this prayer for families from the Episcopal Book of Common Prayer: Almighty God, our heavenly Father, who settest the solitary in families: We commend to thy continual care the homes in which thy people dwell. Put far from them, we beseech thee, every root of bitterness, the desire of vainglory, and the pride of life. Fill them with faith, virtue, knowledge, temperance, patience, godliness. Knit together in constant affection those who, in holy wedlock, have been made one flesh. Turn the hearts of the parents to the children, and the hearts of the children to the parents; and so enkindle fervent charity among us all, that we may evermore be kindly affectioned one to another; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. (BCP 828)

Gratitude Journey: Family

It’s not a coincidence that I chose the week of Thanksgiving as a time to look at Family as a reason to be Grateful to God. In the final weeks of Pentecost we’ve been on a Gratitude Journey. We’ve looked at Nature, Heritage and History, Community, and the World as places we can find reasons for Gratitude.

Family is a complicated organism. It is the people we live with, those we are related to, and those we are descended from. It is also the Family of God, which is a much larger and more diverse entity. Family can comfort us. Family can make us angry. Family can be dysfunctional. Family can hurt and it can heal. It is the first relationship we experience. Family is where we can feel at home, where things are familiar and we know where we stand.  

The readings for Thanksgiving Day help us look at two ways that God provides home and family for the faithful. In the Deuteronomy lesson, God gives instructions for giving thanks “when you have come into the land that the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance…” (Deuteronomy 26:1). Just like at Thanksgiving, “you shall take some of the first of all the fruit of the ground, which you harvest from the land that the Lord your God is giving you…You shall set it down before the Lord your God and bow down before the Lord your God. Then you, together with the Levites and the aliens who reside among you, shall celebrate with all the bounty that the Lord your God has given to you and to your house. (Deuteronomy 26: 2, 10-11)

The lesson from Deuteronomy reminds the Children of Israel that they should remember the family they are from. In a sort of creed, the people were instructed to recite “this response before the Lord your God: ‘A wandering Aramean was my ancestor; he went down into Egypt and lived there as an alien, few in number, and there he became a great nation, mighty and populous. When the Egyptians treated us harshly and afflicted us, by imposing hard labor on us, we cried to the Lord, the God of our ancestors; the Lord heard our voice and saw our affliction, our toil, and our oppression. The Lord brought us out of Egypt with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm, with a terrifying display of power, and with signs and wonders; and he brought us into this place and gave us this land, a land flowing with milk and honey.” (Deuteronomy 26:5-9)

The Epistle gives some instructions on how to get along with one another, perhaps especially those in our family. “Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let your gentleness be known to everyone. The Lord is near. Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. [Think about what is] true, honorable, just, pure, pleasing, commendable, any excellence and worthy of praise…Keep on doing the things that you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, and the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:4-9)

When we gather with family, it can sometimes be difficult to deal with the personalities, and sub-texts between one another. We too often remember past hurts, and maybe even bring them up. Perhaps if we followed the words to the Philippians and looked for the good in each other, our gathering would be easier, and we would find that the ‘God of peace’ will be present. 


You might want to write a creed like the one in Deuteronomy using your own history. For instance, mine might start “A traveling pastor was my great-grandfather…” Or alternatively it could say, “A hardworking farmer was my grandmother…” What might yours say? 

If you are dreading Thanksgiving, make a list of at least one thing you are thankful for about each person attending. You may want to share this with each individual.

This prayer for Thanksgiving from the Book of Common Prayer is a good one to pray on Thanksgiving, or throughout this week. “Almighty and gracious Father, we give you thanks for the fruits of the earth in their season and for the labors of those who harvest them. Make us, we pray, faithful stewards of your great bounty, for the provision of our necessities and the relief of all who are in need, to the glory of your Name; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.”


Starting next week, I’ll be offering a way to deepen your Advent wreath devotions by adding symbols to your wreath throughout Advent. It is hard to keep focused on the Advent part of December with all the stores and music proclaiming Christmas! I hope that by taking some time each day to consider one of the symbolic representations of Advent (adapted from Jesse Tree images), I will find some quiet for my soul, and I invite you to join me. I’ll be posting images, on Facebook, of my own Advent wreath as it progresses.

There will be a video describing the process and a pdf file with images to cut out, or you can create your own with the instructions that will be provided. There are also kits available with the pieces needed for the various symbols. ($5 each) This could be a nice family activity, or you can just use it to deepen your own Advent walk.



If you need some other Bible references about family, try these:

Ephesians 2:19-22, John 1:12-13, John 13:34, Genesis 2:24, Romans 8:15, Col 3:13, Ephesians 6, Proverbs 22:6, 1 Corinthians 13

Advent III: The Birth of John the Baptist: Journeying with Community

We are already at the third week of Advent. On the third Sunday many churches will have pink flowers on the altar to recognize Gaudete Sunday. This was originally to offer a bit of lightness into the mildly penitential tone of Advent. Often the words of Philippians 4:4-6 are sung. “Rejoice in the Lord always; again I say, rejoice. Let your forbearance be known to all, for the Lord is near at hand; have no anxiety about anything, but in all things, by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be

Last week I suggested that “Telling one another when blessings happen deepens the joy for both parties. Let's tell our stories.” Our joy will be greater when shared. This is the time of year when we do a lot of celebrating with friends and with family. Sometimes it can be pretty superficial, but there are also times when you have lunch with a dear friend or two, or with someone in your family and you can share you deepest joys and sorrows.

That is what happens with Elizabeth. It is always more fun to celebrate in community. In following the Way of Love curriculum and Advent calendar*, we come to the community celebration of the birth of John to Elizabeth and Zechariah. Remember, this child would grow up to become John the Baptist, the forerunner of Messiah. For now, though, this is a joyful party rejoicing in the birth of a son to an elderly couple. The Gospel of Luke says, “Her neighbors and relatives heard that the Lord had shown his great mercy to her, and they rejoiced with her.”

The art by Luca Giordano from the 1680s entitled Birth of St John the Baptist captures the joy of the moment when all the friends and family gather together to rejoice at the new baby.  

Inviting the community can be a mixed blessing. Friends and family think they have to have input into all the decisions. “On the eighth day they came to circumcise the child, and they were going to name him Zechariah after his father. But his mother said, “No; he is to be called John.” They said to her, “None of your relatives has this name.” Then they began motioning to his father to find out what name he wanted to give him. He asked for a writing tablet and wrote, “His name is John.” And all of them were amazed. Immediately his mouth was opened and his tongue freed, and he began to speak, praising God. Fear came over all their neighbors, and all these things were talked about throughout the entire hill country of Judea. All who heard them pondered them and said, “What then will this child become?” For, indeed, the hand of the Lord was with him…The child grew and became strong in spirit, and he was in the wilderness until the day he appeared publicly to Israel” (Luke 1:57-80)

In keeping with the theme of ‘rejoice’ this week, the story of John’s birth and circumcision is filled with joy. As soon as he can talk again, “[Zechariah] began to speak, praising God.” His entire prophecy for his son, is a joy-filled hymn of praise in a way that touches on each of the 7 Way of Love disciplines. Take some time this week to pause with each phrase and pray about what it means to you, your Advent journey, and all those on the Way of Love.

Pray: Blessed be the Lord God of Israel, for he has looked favorably on his people and redeemed them.

Worship: He has raised up a mighty savior for us in the house of his servant David

Learn: as he spoke through the mouth of his holy prophets from of old, that we would be saved from our enemies and from the hand of all who hate us. Thus he has shown the mercy promised to our ancestors, and has remembered his holy covenant, the oath that he swore to our ancestor Abraham,

Go: to grant us that we, being rescued from the hands of our enemies, might serve him without fear, in holiness and righteousness before him all our days

Turn: And you, child, will be called the prophet of the Most High; for you will go before the Lord to prepare his ways, to give knowledge of salvation to his people by the forgiveness of their sins.

Bless:  By the tender mercy of our God, the dawn from on high will break upon us, to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death

Rest: to guide our feet into the way of peace.

On the Planner page, you will find some hints for thinking about Community as you go through the week.

The Way of Love curriculum* asks participants to consider all seven of the Way of Love practices (Worship, Go, Learn, Pray, Bless, Turn, Rest) with some thought-provoking questions that you may want to think about.

• Which of the practices brought you the most joy…or blessing? Which practice has been life-giving and where did you cross borders?

• How does your community celebrate joy together? How does your community support others in their joy?

• Who in your faith community has a prophetic voice? (perhaps it is you)

• When have you experienced God’s love for you here? When have you felt yourself loving God in the context of this community?

This week you may want to use this prayer from the curriculum:

Merciful God of peace, your word, spoken by the prophets, restores your people’s life and hope: Fill our hearts with the joy of your saving grace, that we may hold fast to your great goodness and proclaim your justice in all the world. Amen [Revised Common Lectionary Prayers, alt., proposed by the Consultation on Common Texts (Minneapolis: Fortress Press, 2002), p. 33].

*Way of Love Advent Curriculum; By Jenifer Gamber and Becky Zartman; Copyright © 2018 by The Episcopal Church;

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